Catch Yourself then Pull Yourself Up
by SandyF on 05/04/11 at 4:14 pm
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Thoughts Emerge by Sandy Flores
Sometimes it starts as a joke. It might be funny at first.
Then you continue to mention it here and there. Before you know it, you are convinced it is true. As we all know, once we think something is true, everything we see and experience seems to reinforce it. “See? I told you!” Our mind will do as we say. This month I experienced the power of thoughts and words.
The negative ranting started light-heartedly by telling friends that my Spring Break would turn out to be more like my “Spring Broke.” Since the beginning of the month I was experiencing obstacles and unexpected expenses. I had to take my dog to the vet and get x-rays done. My car broke down on me on the freeway and has been in the dealer three times for service because they keep trying to hustle me. USPS lost my smart phone after it was sent back to me from repairs. My insurance changed their prescription policy without notifying me so when I tried to pick up a prescription at the pharmacy, they wanted to charge me full price. It was a Sunday so the insurance company was closed and I couldn’t miss a dose! I got a traffic ticket in the mail with a hefty fine for not making a yellow and running a red.
My tax return didn’t turn out to be as great as expected and I had to deal with my ex-husband to sort things out, which brought about some emotional drama. I could go on. At this point, any time things didn’t go my way (like ordering something and being told they were out) I told myself, “See? This is not your month!”
But I didn’t stop at just telling myself. I told everyone I had conversations with!!
I didn’t realize how destructive this habit had become. I began to feel worse and worse about my situation. I felt sorry for myself and I can admit I sought pity from others. Why else would I share my “misery”? Sure, it’s perfectly healthy to vent with a close friend and let your frustrations out. But it is not necessary to share with anyone you come across. I have read plenty of books and have friends who remind me about the power of thoughts and words. Some notes I’ve taken from previous readings include:
“…our brains become magnetized with the dominating thoughts which we hold in our minds…these “magnets” attract to us the forces, the people, the circumstances of life which harmonize with the nature of our dominating thoughts.”
“Thoughts are boomerangs, returning with precision to their source. Choose wisely which ones you throw.”
“Thoughts are things; they have tremendous power. Thoughts of doubt and fear are pathways to failure. When you conquer negative attitudes of doubt and fear you conquer failure. Thoughts crystallize into habit and habit solidifies into circumstances.”
But despite what I know, I caught myself spiraling into despair. I wanted to crawl into my bed and disappear.
I wanted to give up, whatever that meant.
I seriously had that thought and may have even said it to a friend: “I want to give up”! My mind was dominated with self-sabotaging thoughts. I began to EXPECT that situations would go against my wishes. That is sad, right? Hey, we all have our sad moments! Yes, I cried several times.
There was no “aha” moment that finally made me realize I was causing myself extra misery. I think I finally had enough of my own pity party and was ready to improve what I was thinking, saying, and FEELING.
That’s right, I was ready to take control of how I felt. And it starts with a thought.
A wonderful friend of mine gave me a book for my birthday, which has come in handy many times. It is titled, “Manifest Your Desires: 365 Ways to Make Your Dreams Reality” by Esther and Jerry Hicks. It’s a great little reference book with something to ponder every day of the year. And no matter what I’m going through, every time I open that book and read a page, it speaks to me. I would like to share a couple of things from this book that helped me to catch myself and pull myself up.
The first was this quote: “Once you are in control of the way you feel, you will enjoy it all: You will feel relief as doubts slip away and as the secure feelings of Well-Being replace them”. Yes! I need to take back control of how I was feeling. It is up to me to change my present state of being.
Now, let me clarify one thing before I continue….I am NOT saying that you ignore or mask your feelings when you find yourself in tough situations. I am also not saying that you should pretend to feel differently. What I am saying is that we can reach for a slightly better thought and a better feeling. Reach within your grasp. A leap would not be authentic. I am speaking more about modifying your present train of thought so that it doesn’t manifest into something worse.
The second thing I would like to share from the book is this handy scale of emotions:
1. Joy/Knowledge/Empowerment/ Freedom/Love/Appreciation
2. Passion
3. Enthusiasm/Eagerness/ Happiness
4. Positive Expectation/Belief
5. Optimism
6. Hopefulness
7. Contentment
8. Boredom
9. Pessimism
10. Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
11. “Overwhelment”
12. Disappointment
13. Doubt
14. Worry
15. Blame
16. Discouragement
17. Anger
18. Revenge
19. Hatred/Rage
20. Jealousy
21. Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
22. Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness
Everybody feels emotions differently. Giving emotions a label sometimes does us a disservice. Acknowledge how you feel and why. Do not ignore the feelings that don’t feel good. But the important thing that truly matters here is that you consciously reach for a better feeling; it doesn’t have to be far from your present emotional state. So you climb the scale to get to an improved, authentic feeling and to avoid falling further down. I will leave you with these words from the book:
“You are the creator of your own experience whether you know that you are or not. Your life experience is unfolding in precise response to the vibrations that radiate as a result of your thoughts-whether you know that it is or not.”
Photography by Erlina Sinaga
I am a visual artist and visual arts educator. I strive to enrich my life and the lives of others through art and self-awareness. As an artist I explore, question, interpret, communicate, and share. As a teacher I hope to make positive contributions to the individuals I come in contact with. My ultimate goal is to connect with people on a deeper level so we can make this world a better place to live and play. For fun I like to spend time with my dogs, play soccer, hike, dance, and cook. I have even started a blog with my sister in which we attempt traditional Mexican family recipes every month (www.mexicanfamilyrecipes.blogspot.com)
Thérèse Cator
